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In-House Review - Dec 10 2006
Jesus. These Plain Wrapped titles just keep on coming. They're all exclusively released on DVD for the first time, each with an impressive array of extras. I've sat through the entire collection, and I remember the good old days when I used to be con...
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Jesus. These Plain Wrapped titles just keep on coming. They're all exclusively released on DVD for the first time, each with an impressive array of extras. I've sat through the entire collection, and I remember the good old days when I used to be content seeing two guys just holding hands. Nowadays, if those guys aren't shoving their clasped hands up a third guys rectum, I feel cheated. This film won Best Special Interest Video at the GVG Awards and after watching this you'll wonder why it didn't walk off with a few Oscars. Things in here will make your eyes water, your toes curl, your sphincter tighten and your cock shoot the most it's ever shot. Be aroused, be very aroused! It's a military theme this time, and it's always a pleasure when Plain Wrapped deviate from their usual dungeon themes: heck, they made baseball truly filthy in Batter Up! OK, let's see a bunch of guys be all that they can be, by taking huge foreign objects up their assholes. We start with Sarge Ford in his office, putting Wolff through his paces: "Do you like the feeling of authority?" he asks. "Yes sir" replies the Private. "Open the drawer soldier," he commands and Wolff obliges, his eyebrows shooting right off his forehead when he looks inside. "Are you prepared to do your duty?" Ford enquires, unbuckling his fatigues. Off come the trousers and we discover the "duty." Fuck your commanding officer with a giant dildo. Never one to disobey a direct order Wolff proceeds to thrust it in and out of Ford's foxhole, sending him shuddering with joy. Wolff then uses both hands to further stretch those cheeks before slowly expanding his innards with his fists. After punchfucking him for a while Wolff suddenly runs from the office leaving his angry commander furiously shouting, "Where are you going? I'm not through with you yet! Private!" Rightly so. How is Wolff gonna be able to defend his country when he can't even finish off a simple fistjob? Elsewhere new recruit West is getting a buzzcut from Saxon. In a great leap of logic we suddenly see West bearing his ass to the barber who coats his cheeks with crème - that ass needs a shave and expert Saxon soon has it softer than a baby's! Saxon begins to loosen up West's hole with a finger. He patiently works four up there and begins to fingerfuck West, who's having an amazing time. The Saxon introduces West to his first ever dildo. He slowly and expertly introduced the well-lubed latex monster inside, and when West is totally relaxed, fucks him with it, all the while slapping and playing with the raw recruit's balls. Turned over, West, mewing like a nymphomaniac kitten, works his huge cock whilst Saxon probes him even deeper with the sex toy. Unable to stop himself West shoots everywhere, sobbing like a baby as the gloop flies. This scene is fabulous and I had to take a smoke break to calm down. Cut to the quarters and sexy, hirsute Sylvano (who is either Czech or Italian depending on who you ask - Czecalian?) is alone on his bunk. What's a horny soldier to do? Get out the two foot long dildo you keep in your storage and get busy! He sucks the latex lovely whilst fingering and slapping his asscheeks. He rides the monstrosity and let's rip some really filthy verbal too! He constantly removes the dildo so we can see his ever expanding sphincter, which almost rosebuds at one point. The white lube dripping out of a well abused hole! Lying on his cot with another dildo, he thrusts it in and out telling the audience that he wants us "to fuck my pussy" over and over again. Get to the back of the line, I'm up first! His rectum truly ruptured, he releases a volcano of the white stuff that he then rubs into his sweaty body. Another smoke break here. Prepare to be amazed, sickened and shocked as Batboy is introduced. Also prepare to roll about on the floor in hysterics. No build up here, this Rupert Everett lookalike already has a behemoth up his ass, which he rips out and thrusts back in for all our pleasures. But here's the thing that you will never forget. Every in and out causes the loudest most hilarious farty slurps you have ever heard. Has this guy got gastric flu? It's a total lack of style and that's what makes it even more stylish. I guess the producers just had to keep it in, because this guy sounds like he's got a Warner Brothers cartoon up his catflap. You'll notice smoke rising in the background and I'm guessing that's actually methane. One stray spark and the whole studio would have gone up in flames. And that sphincter opens and shuts unaided so much it looks like it could teach the Pop Idols a thing or two about miming. You got to see this scene to believe it. I swear to Almighty God! Back in the quarters a naked Sylvano is set upon by two comrades, Ferage and Harris. They both hold him down as Harris begins to finger fuck him, before the whole hand slips in. The mega dildo reappears and they their captive to "back up onto it" which he does, as Ferage him to ride it even more wildly. In a really hot sequence Ferage holds Sylvano's legs behind his head by supporting his knees with his rifle, exposing that hole to Harris' thick black dildo that he's using with great pleasure. The dirty talk just doesn't stop and soon Harris is shooting his baby-gravy all over Sylvano's tight hairy torso. There's another short scene with the amazing flatulent Batboy, who partakes in an impressive feat of self-fisting (way past the wrist!) before showing us how he got his name. Out comes a large wooden baseball bat and guess where it ends up! Where do they find these people? Who moved the rock? Next up more barrack-antics as Ferage astounds God and Nature by being another performer who takes the infamous Plain Wrapped three foot long traffic cone buttplug all the way to the hilt. Guys who do this really deserve a star on Hollywood Boulevard. He then takes both of Harris' hands before his right arm, all the way to the elbow. A quick two handed punch fuck and we return to Batboy, who's got one last trick up his, ahem, sleeve. What's he doing lubing up that heavy duty industrial anchor link? He pushes it all the way in - or rather, his ass sucks it in like a strand of spaghetti - then pulls it back out with a number of accompanying farts. This was Batboy's first and only porno, and I hope he's now making a living touring the South as part of a travelling freakshow. And the film ends. Oh Dear God. You've got to buy this. Not just if you are into extreme assplay - Batboy's Mr. Methane act will entertain your partygoers for years to come. Whatever insanity gripped Plain Wrapped when they made this fuckflick, please keep it coming! -Froufrou A. Gogo
Review by buddhawannabe
By: buddhawannabe
From 1996--one of Plain Wrapped Video's earlier efforts. Froufrou's 1,202-word review will provide you with all the necessary detail, and then some. It's got a nice, casual quality; you get the impression that Scarborough sent out a casting call to a...
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From 1996--one of Plain Wrapped Video's earlier efforts. Froufrou's 1,202-word review will provide you with all the necessary detail, and then some. It's got a nice, casual quality; you get the impression that Scarborough sent out a casting call to all the sex clubs in San Francisco--"Wanna be in a dildo/fisting video?," picked out the eight hottest, and let them loose. Nothing particularly military about it, except for the clothes, a few props from Army Surplus, and the occasional cliché (guy is sitting in a barber chair, getting military haircut, and ends up getting extensive ass-play as a bonus). I didn't find Batboy as remarkable as Froufrou did--he didn't even bother to get a military haircut--but I do like Frank Sylvano, who's got a nice body, a cute, masculine face, and is obviously having a really good time, poking himself and then being poked by others. ("Have others do unto you as you would do unto yourself." Whatever.) Probably more impressive at the time it came out, when there weren't so many military-themed movies and certainly not many of military-types getting fisted, but worth a look, and you may find yourself mentally elaborating on Frank's adventures during your next jerk-off session.