Review

I see dead people… and they’re doing porn!

Despite this military-themed fuckfest’s upbeat title, some of the actors here look so lifeless and disinterested, you’ll think you’re watching Night of the Living Dead. In this platoon, they should have handed out Vivarin instead of food rations!

Poor editing, mind-numbing music and throwaway dialogue plagues the opening scene with top Lee Walters and hungry bottom Brad Hanson. (At one point, Hanson wears a camouflage wife-beater while getting plowed, but then suddenly appears shirtless mid-fuck).

Walters looks like he might fall asleep at any moment, and it’s only Hanson’s dogged determination that gives this sequence any intensity. When Walters delivers the fakest orgasm since Michael Jackson was married to Lisa Marie Presley, we were left “flat.”

Things improve greatly as sailor Jeremy Jordan goes to town on Jean Valjean’s monster missile. (Who cares if they mix up the different branches of the military? Just keep it hot!). If only Valjean (who could pass as Antonio Sabato Jr.’s brother) would look interested in the steamy action going on between his legs. Sigh…that’s what you get for letting straights in the military.

You can’t tell what the hell Eric Estevez is saying in the next scene, but he’s soon quieted anyway by Park Wiley’s tongue in his mouth. This is the best scene of the lot - the chemistry between these two is obviously real, and the addition of actual foreplay is a nice touch. Unfortunately, Estevez gets a little too caught up in looking in the mirror, but snaps-to for the money shot.

With all that climactic action, the final sequence (in which corporal daddy Patrick Ives gives it up to twinkie cadet Joksan) seems almost unnecessary. At the very least, it should have come earlier. Once again we see an eager bottom paired with a seemingly bored or distracted top. Gee, fellas - don’t do us any favors.
-Jimmy Rocket