Review

Drenched Part 1 (Falcon Pac 149)
Miss Chi Chi and her gang of gorgeous guys head for the tropical paradise of Hawaii - and they’re backed up by one of the biggest budgets ever allotted for the making of a frisky fuck flick. Pay attention, porn doggies, for this one gloriously raises the bar.

It all begins when a smooth buff hottie (Brad Patton) wading through a cove finds a mysterious tiki figure floating in the water. It seems to conjure up the very tasty and cock-starved Lane Fuller, who looks like a lost, wandering Marine, complete with some tats, a military style buzz cut, a light swath of torso fuzz and a dazed, lascivious look in his eyes that practically shouts “have at me!”

Lane approaches splashily and proceeds to lock lips with Brad while untying his stylish bathing trunks, revealing an immensely thick, uncut and uniquely upcurved Brad Bone, already rock hard. (More on Brad’s luscious apparatus: when his nutsack is taut, his squeezed balls appear to be docked over his meat instead of hanging beneath it, providing the unworldly illusion that his extra-large cock and balls are affixed upside-down! Call Ripley’s.)

Enough about Brad’s mystifying schlong though, because Lane soon receives an awesome rim chew in the water that gets his undivided attention (undivided save for his milky quivering ass cheeks), followed by more cock-gobblery on the nearby grass, and then a sensuous round of rubbing and kissing and dry humping so intense both guys quickly squirt off thick hands-free wads of boy cream.

Elsewhere in a sunny meadow, tall hung stud Jack Ryan and clipped-torso’d fuck puppy Chet Roberts frolic on a park bench. During their heated round of fellatio, blonde dreamboat Tommy Brandt appears and begins to self-stroke from the treeline and soon joins the fray for a brief three-way round of sucky-sucky…

…Brief in that things quickly escalate into a foursome, heralded by the arrival of dark-maned exotic smooth hottie Renato Leon, whose uncut piece soon finds its way to the back of Chet’s anxious throat, all while Jack proceeds to suckle on adjacent Tommy’s branding iron.

Dark beefy muscle hunk Filippo Romano approaches the bench with still-horny Lane and Brad in tow, and suddenly we’ve got a salivating seven-man cock-slurping, mangina-munching, hole-humping orgy under the blazing Hawaiian sun that culminates in one of the juiciest cum-soaked climaxes in this particular porn-fiend’s memory, with slut-punk Lane emerging completely slathered with jerked jetted jissom.

Next up, superbly physiqued Falcon Superstar Chase Hunter makes an authoritative mustachioed return to man porn, pairing off with seemingly insatiable cock-fiend Lane. A mutually voracious round of deep throating and ass rimming commences, followed by Lane’s bouncy ride on Chase’s thick manly fuck prod.

Somewhere near a babbling brook, lean, dark and drop-dead-pretty Falcon Exclusive Andrew Phillips approaches beefy smooth muscle hunk Joe Foster, both wearing what I can only describe as manly hula skirts. Both guys paw and grope at the bulges protruding from the crotches of said hula skirts, then Joe kneels to lick Andrew’s fuzzy treasure trail, soon taking the boy’s big plump glistening schlong firmly into his gullet. Joe stops blowing Andrew only to squeeze and suck on his big dangling ’nads and tongue poke and goatee-rub his undulating cherry hole.

But for all the tongue-prepping Joe offers to Andrew’s pretty pucker hole, it’s Joe’s rump that ends up getting raided by the poking lunge of Andrew’s ample tool.

Next we spy Matthew Rush soaking wet in a screened-in outdoor shower; he’s easily identifiable by that bodacious bubble booty he carries on his hips just as bounteously as a pregnant woman might carry twins. Viktor Perseo ogles from outside the screen door, and when he approaches, Matthew and Viktor rub their ever-plumpening cocks together, separated only by the mesh screen.

Inside, they get on with a mutual suck-and-gag on a sofa in front of a scenic picture window. Matt hungrily eats out Viktor’s fur hole and then slides in his thick man salami for some passionate poking.

Production values are simply impeccable, with stylish camerawork, fabulous sunny exteriors, smooth editing, a throbbing trance music score and a simmering smorgasbord of hungry cock-wielders who are not only hot, but also hot for each other.

This fantastic DVD offers two discs of delicious debauchery. Disc One contains the feature in all its sumptuous sun-kissed glory. Disc Two contains an additional 45 minutes of candid behind-the-scenes video diary footage of photo shoots, location scouts, cast-and-crew minglings and unrehearsed interview bytes, all of which show our dreamy boys and men completely at ease.

Two extended sex scenes show more wanking antics between Andrew Phillips and Joe Foster, and more ass-poking sex between Matthew Rush and Viktor Perseo. And, unless my intelligence is faulty, this could be the first time Chi Chi has ever appeared in a making-of-his-own-movie featurette dressed down and out-of-drag.
-Beef Stroganoff

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Drenched Part 2 (Falcon Pac 150)
Review written by Beef Stroganoff:
The tropical paradise of Hawaii once again provides a sun-splashed backdrop for more exquisite jock-on-jock action, and though my briefs are still sticky wet from Drenched Part 1: Soaking It In, I readily creamed with joy over the splashy cock-a-licious shenanigans in Drenched Part 2: Soaked to the Bone.

Touted as the most expensive porno endeavor yet, Falcon’s double-barreled Drenched offers the most stunning production values ever conjured for man porn, and is populated with the creamiest of the porn-stud crop.

Up first, Falcon Exclusive Bobby Williams (who’s got a sexy Nick Stahl thing going on) espies darkly hunky and deliciously uncut studfuck Filippo Romano pleasuring himself in an outdoor shower. They set a bonfire with a voracious round of outdoor cock swallowing, rim chewing and hole probing. Filippo’s creamy hands-free spurt during their climactic mutual stroke-off makes up for the lack of buggery here.

Over by the jagged shoreline, Carlos Morales and Fernando Montana encounter each other on the lava rocks and start stroking and sucking each others’ big thick fuck sticks. Fernando eats Carlos’ hole under the blazing sun, then plows his starved booty right there on the rocks.

Matthew Rush pops up next on a beach towel, soaking up the sun and tugging on his pud. Falcon Exclusive Tyler Gunn sidles up, whips out his own stiffening staff and drops to stroke and suck Matthew’s thick bone, by now fully erect. After some rim slurping, Tyler takes a variety of positions sitting down on Matthew’s cock, at one point prying apart his own invaded ass cheeks to more generously provide us with a better view of Matthew’s plunged-in cock.

Adorable surfer boy Trent Atkins catches handsome Chase Hunter’s eye, and we’re instantly transported back to Chase’s boudoir, as he’s peeling off Trent’s stylish wetsuit. Nipple play and face sucking lead to pit licking and crotch sniffing. But all of this is a mere prelude to Chase’s finger prodding and tongue-poking of Trent’s precious pink-eye. By the time Trent cock-swallows Chase’s rigid manly tool, both studs are sweaty as pigs.

More sweat drips: After munching out on Chase’s hole, Trent spreads wide his legs and takes the powerful lunge of Chase’s thick fuck rod. Chase, by the bye, has the firm bubble buttocks of a 21-year-old muscle jock, so cheers to you and your fabulous booty, Mister Hunter!

A serene tropical cove is the setting for our next tryst, between frosted blonde sexpot (and Falcon Exclusive) Josh Weston and tall, lean and sculpted studfuck Alex LeMonde (who, Jackass fans might be aroused to learn, is a spot-on ringer for Johnny Knoxville).

After some frolicking between Josh and Alex under the waterfalls, we cut abruptly to brooding hottie Zackary Pierce stroking his longfellow on a patio chair. Latino hunk (and Falcon Exclusive) Vince Ditonno approaches and stoops to suck it. Then we spy blonde jock Cade Devlin through the screen door, jerking his crank while spying Vince and Zackary making out and blowing each other. He joins in by lowering his ass over Vince’s face, all the easier for Vince to offer Cade a rim chew while getting blown by Zackary.

Josh and Alex approach and presto! - we’ve got a simmering five-man orgy complete with three-finger heinie-poking, deep-shaft cock gagging and good old-fashioned ass-marauding. The climactic group cum gush leaves lucky Vince simply soaking in semen.

Suffice it to say, Miss Chi Chi and the folks at Falcon have outdone themselves. To paraphrase one of the many raves for the climactic Lord of the Rings flick, this sumptuous cock tale is poised to be the new gold standard by which all other porn fantasies will be measured. The superfluous production values and tropical locales offer gorgeous scenery - the money spent making these movies is definitely evident in the crisp, superb imagery throughout - yet it’s the dreamy cast of scrumptious jock hotties who provide the sweetest eye candy.

Disc 2 of this double DVD set packs even more penis, with over 20 minutes of extended scenes offering more sucking and slurping and stroking. There’s also another video diary (shot by performer-turned-videographer Colby Taylor) of unscripted interviews, fluffing sessions, photo shoots, location scouts and spontaneous cast-and-crew shenanigans, which in their own unrehearsed way provide for a more casually revealing peek into the making of a porno flick - not to mention the comradery amongst the cast and crew - than most behind-the-fucking production documentaries ever quite manage.
-Beef Stroganoff

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