Review

Colby Taylor plays a whiny homo who invites his old (allegedly hetero) school chum Wade up to his fabulous house so he can tell him he likes to pack fudge. But before he can spill the beans, Wade picks up their yearbook and starts reminiscing about Taylor’s legendary make out session with his ho’ at Lover’s Lane.

As Taylor remembers what really happened, we’re invited into his head to find out what really happened on that moonlit night...

A visibly nervous Taylor and his slutty galpal are about to lock lips, but Taylor has to take a pee-pee. While on his urinary expedition, he catches sight of another couple making out in a nearby car. But lo and behold, they’re both boys! Taylor watches and yanks his doodle as the two (ultra-twink Christian Taylor and mega-manly Montes) start to get it on. First, Taylor swallows as much as he can of Montes’ enormous pickle.

After a lengthy suck session, Taylor takes Montes’ massive member up the manhole. Taylor rides that thang like a seasoned professional, and squeals like a feral piglet. In the end, this little piggy ends up getting a spunk bath courtesy of Mr. Mule Dick. In the meantime, the other Taylor (Colby) has gotten his own rocks off while watching. God only knows what his girlfriend was doing in the car that whole time.

Anyway, back to the conversation between Colby Taylor and Wade. Taylor throws the closet door wide open, and Wade heads in the other direction. Taylor is sad. But not for long. While Wade is down at the lake skimming stones, he stumbles upon a three-way between Davis, Johnson and Fox. Davis and Fox are hung like donkeys, and Johnson handles them like a sword swallower, even taking two at once. Johnson then becomes their fuck-vessel, as they take turns plunging his yawning hollow. A three-way sandwich is next on the agenda. Eventually, Johnson shoots a hands-free load, before getting a lovely facial varnishing and ball-frosting. At times the scene is a bit mechanical, but it’s still rather steamy overall.

That night, Taylor is getting blue balls from having Wade in his house, so he pops a porn into the VCR and starts shucking his cob. We are then transported inside the porno, where scorching hotties Damon and Iron are doing naughty things. This is arguably the film’s hottest scene, because the lust between these two is palpable. Damon is a swarthy studmuffin with a moderately hairy body and a sizeable stiffie that won’t quit. This foul-mouthed, spitting bad boy pounds Iron’s face with an abandon that’s really arousing. Iron then assumes the position and Damon wreaks sheer havoc on Iron’s rosebud. Damon ends up dumping his stud-syrup in Iron’s asscrack. Who says romance is dead?

In the last scene, Wade decides he’s just a big old Nancy-boy after all and climbs in bed with Taylor. His long-term crush finally requited, Taylor goes to town on Wade’s nether regions. They end up taking turns sucking and fucking (yes, Mr. Wade bottoms), but Taylor’s lack of excitement for much of the segment is somewhat of a buzzkill. Wade is all about the sex, however, giving the scene a boost.

 -- T.J. Maxxwell