Review

The two hour epic Sueños showcases Alex LeMonde set against the luxurious European backdrop of, aww Hell, it could be anywhere with sun, sea and mountains. We open as heroic LeMonde saves Balu (the bear?) from drowning, diving from a clifftop (look Ma, I do my own stunts!) and saving him from the ocean's ferocious calm.

Once revived (does the kiss of life have any other purpose apart from getting two guys to French?) grateful Balu repays his savior and onlooker Thijme (a.k.a. Jan Rick) with a tonsil-hockey-heavy shoreline love scene that makes From Here to Eternity look like a documentary about dead nuns.

Everyone sucks everyone before LeMonde fucks them both, giving Thijme a second seeing-to that really draws attention to that wonderful sound of balls slapping ass. A perfect percussion beat that leads to their lovebomb releases... just watch out for that camera lens!

Meanwhile, I’m trying to translate the title. Does it mean sunburn? 'Coz Balu’s really got the Rock Lobster look. And, I think I went to school with someone named Gayle Träume.

I think I’ve lost the plot though, because next there’s a very hot scene featuring three guys on a boat, fighting to be the one to cram the most inches of cock down their throat but I have no idea if there’s a story connecting the two scenes. Who cares? Just sit back and watch Schneider get his hole explored, and then gasp as Lucas gets a blow job from Ruso whilst performing a handstand! It’s an incredibly amazing erotic mess. God Bless those whacky Europeans with their foreskins, versatile human sandwiches and facial cumshots. Whew!

To the spa next where Balu Saved From Drowning seduces muscular Graber. The duo travel from hot-tub to gym to pool to poolside, taking their time to enjoy their mutual sucking, rimming and fucking that comes complete with some great Jacques Cousteau-esque underwater photography.

No, LeMonde isn’t taking pictures of trees and asking them to pose, it’s just a confusing while before we see he’s actually snapping beautiful black model Berlin. As night falls, cheeky Lucas agrees to participate and is soon swallowing his uncut tool. Pretty soon Ruso joins in and the party grows even larger when LeMonde finally puts down the camera and dives in, too. Everyone is a great cocksucker and none seem to tire. When LeMonde fucks Ruso who is already up Lucas it’s truly awe-inspiring!

Morning breaks, and Thijme (Jan Rick) treats us to a solo enema scene that doesn’t shy away from anything! Pipe goes up – water comes out! Lots and lots of water. Hitting the bedroom, he teases a chain of love-balls up his fresh ass, attracting the attentions of Graber, who wants to try them as well. Pretty soon the couple is joined at the ass with the balls that eventually plop out with a satisfying cry of delight. A flip-flop-fuck of speedtrain power sees Graber getting a faceful of muck from Thijme, whilst delivering two loads himself.

Excuse the dreadful Eurotrash fashions in the nightclub scene and just enjoy Love’s stripshow whilst Graber seduces Berlin as he takes a leak in the bathroom (all shown in loving close-up - kinky Euro Pigs!). On the dance-floor Love has taken a shine to Schneider and sucks him there and then, leading to a very hot facial cumshot.

Having broken their assignation to perform a sizzling strip-tease, Berlin returns to finish Graber off, their moonlit al fresco fuck seeing Graber penetrated from every angle known to man, and then some! Berlin lets loose a stream of lovepiss all over his beau’s face and with that, two hours of joy come to an abrupt end.

Wow! Great camerawork, energetic memorable performances, and natural English dialogue make this one of director Haller’s most memorable fuckflicks to date. He’s discovered the secret of good pornomaking, and he’s gracefully let us in on it! Move over Rover, man’s got a new best friend. Oh, and Sueños means "dreams."

 -- Froufrou A. Gogo