Review

Another in Cam-Am's canon of wrestling themed/"get your revenge on"/"get your grope" on hardcore flicks. While they certainly have their devoted fans, these jockfests are starting to feel very "dated" (in an early 90s way), and if you're not a fan this probably isn't the title to convert you.

Joining up with Jet Set (some of their models are used here) this entry left me pretty soft. I like almost every model here (I was a fan of the late Dante) but they don't have a lot to do. The set-up is pretty much the same every time: One guy "calls another guy out" and they wrestle. In some instances that's all they do; here we get cumshots at match's end.

There's not alot of point - or space, actually - in describing everything that happens. So, here are the basic scenarios:

Jet Set star Brett Mycles' "younger brother" Justin has apparently commited some type of unforgivable sin against the blond Dante in Dante's Champions (a body-waxing gone awry, perhaps?) and Dante wants revenge. Justin, mopping the gym floor (hence the title) wants nothing to do with him. In a split second, Dante lunges at Justin and the two go at it. For, like... err... 43 minutes.

During that time, we are treated to a non-stop parade of crotch grabs, dirty talk ("Fuck you" and "You like that, bitch?" are uttered ad nauseum by both), body slams, slaps, wedgies (yes, wedgies) take-downs and the pulling off of and strangling with singlets and jocks. Oh, and eventually Dante knocks out the beefier Justin, carries him to an elevated oil mat in another room, slathers him in a massive bottle of baby oil, and slips and slides all over him.

Now, I always thought that oil wrestling not only looked ridiculous, but my mind always drifted away from the action to things like "Who cleans this up afterwards?" and "That can't be good for one's pores." Well this time I was into it; it was still ridiculous (even Dante smiles a bit at times when he's supposed to be snarly) but it was undeniably erotic. Soon Dante's thick piece is in Justin's mouth, along with a magically appearing dildo that he shoves up Justin's ass. No lube required, obviously. Dante blows a massive creamload on Justin's chest; Justin eventually spunks himself a decent load.

The next scene features the hunky (and highlighted) Cody Prescott squaring off with the beefier Callahan. more of the same takes place (no oil this time though). I just have a hard time believing any of this, as the line deliveries, while convincing, are way too dramatic. I mean, what guy actually talks like this when fighting? A young Russian janitor (the very cute but wimpy Val) comes to clean the floor - and the other two won't have it. Lots of body-breaking stretching, verbal abuse, body slams and the like, before Cody and Cal each give Val their dangling skin pal. A quick fuck by each to Val, and then three loads are blown.

I could go on and on describing each and every position seen here, but one: I don't know the technical terms for all of them, and two: I don't care enough to. Some of the moves seen here are very real and caused the genuine grimaces of pain; others were laughably bad and looked like WWF stunts. The whole point of these films is to eroticize the grappling and groping, and to include hardcore sex. Director Moore has done better in the past, and hopefully will get a burst of creativity again soon.

Mopped Up isn't a total bust; it's just that I would have liked more sex, more realistic grappling, and less overly-smooth, fake-sounding "actors" at the helm. Still, you may find yourself mopping up your own stomach afterwards - especially if you're a fan.
-Rick W. Ski