Review

Sometimes I have to tip my hat and admit nothing that I could write can beat these pornos' original liner notes. This is one of those times. Just read this, courtesy of Hot House:

"Just when you were beginning to think that there was no life after the lofty heights of Acres of Ass I and II, Plain Wrapped presents the spectacular double whammy of Mo' Betta' Butt and it's bad brother Mo' Bigga' Butt. "No", you say, "nothing could ever possibly compete with all that gaping, snappin' booty in Acres of Ass." Well, we are happy to say that both Mo' Betta' Butt and Mo' Bigga' Butt not only hold their own but push the boundaries of ass-play even further into uncharted territory.” © Hot House Entertainment

Jesus! Were they on drugs? Thankfully these two films live up to their hype, as we follow on from the sleazy original, replacing some faces and butts with even hotter ones.

If you managed to live through the first, welcome back, hope your stomach can take more. (My Valium is about to kick in.) If you haven’t seen the first, fear not, but it’s still a highly recommended companion piece you should try to catch. Intense fisting and assplay with a healthy dose of S and M pepper both titles to perfection!

It’s a welcome return for Texan Legend Big Daddy Hammer, described as a “one man carnival” but more realistically he’s a “one man freakshow.” I’m sure if you asked him politely, he’d bite he heads off a few chickens at no extra charge. His hooded slave Hood also makes a reappearance; what a glutton for punishment that young man is.

But starting is off is the ever fabulous Jay warming us all up with a great solo scene where he watches an extreme ass-punishing video and copies what he sees on the screen. The in-joke here is that he’s watching his own performance in Acres of Ass 2. The toys keep coming, getting bigger and thicker and longer but Jay can handle them easily. He’s so cool, I just love him! And did I mention that filthy mouth? Makes me love him even more. If you don’t feel the same way you will after he proudly displays his bashed-up rosebudding sphincter for all to see.

Remember when the T-Rex first appeared in Jurassic Park? Vibrations in the glass of water, slowly intensifying as the beast approached? Well, a similar device should be used whenever Big Daddy is introduced. This time he’s kindly letting his slave fist him, which is sweet, because usually slaves have a really tough time. Hood successfully gets two hands up at once (do you think he clapped them?) causing Daddy to spaz attack in his restraints. The next surprise (and a wonderful one at that) is that Hood not only slides in all the way to his elbow, but looks like he could quite easily climb all the way in.

Jay is back next, legs in the air so high you’d think his feet were full of helium. Whatever could he be hiding up there? The answer soon pops out - pool balls. Along comes muscle-bound English leatherman O’Rourke who keeps feeding that hole with as many as it can take. I can’t help but wonder if O’Rourke was pulling that face when the wind suddenly changed direction, but lets keep our claws in. Just gasp in awe. I really wanted Jay to say, “Eight ball, corner pocket” - but it wasn’t to be.

Master and Slave roles continue to be reversed as Hood continues to feed his Daddy massive traffic-cone sized buttplugs. Jay looks on, whilst sliding his arms into long black rubber gloves. What’s he planning? Well, lets just say his fist has a date with Daddy’s large intestine and they don’t want to be late.

You’ve all been good boys so far, so settle back for your reward: welcome Mark Anthony. You all love this hot Englishman and yes, he’s gorgeous and yes, he’s got the body of an Olympian God. But I’ve had the misfortune of working with him, and not only is he as dumb as rocks with the memory capacity of a goldfish, he suffers the occasional hard-on problem. (I stunt-dicked for him once; luckily, the movie was so awful it never made it to the U.S.)

Anthony admires his great physique in a mirror whilst attaching a nipple chain to himself, as O’Rourke and Jay beat their meat in anticipation. One last look at himself and Anthony turns around and devotes his attentions to the two. Jay immediately orders Anthony to orally service them both and he willingly respond, whilst O’Rourke lets rip with dirty talk that made me cringe - filthy words in an English accent are just embarrassing!

Jay doesn’t like waiting for his rewards, so he bends Anthony over, spreads his hole wide with his fingers and tongue-fucks that welcoming ass. And surprise, surprise - all that anal attention and still as soft as raw cookie dough. In all fairness, he does goes through some really heavy dildo play. That’ll teach him!

Wanting some anal devotion himself Jay has the two muscular limeys fuck him with (the regulatory monster-sized) dildos. We finish with the roaring Jay getting fisted by Anthony. And so the film ends and we close the lid on Plain Wrapped’s latest assault on decency for yet another night. But they’ll keep ‘em coming and I can’t wait to keep on watching!