Review

Studio 2000 International once again proves that glasnost and the fall of communism really did benefit the American porno industry more than it benefited the natives.

In this Hungarian Rhapsody a fresh faced director has gathered ten fresh-faced mainly new performers who no doubt we’ll be getting very familiar with over the coming years. We can all grow old together. Awww. It’ll be like The Waltons.

The young good-looking cast (aged between 19-29) is all gorgeous, smooth and foreskinned. We know what you like! It seems that the only time we ever get to see the Hungarian Army it’s in gay porno, and here our troops are playing wargames with paintballs - surely one of the most tedious “team adventure pursuits” ever guaranteed to bring out the closet-psycho Ramboesque Nazi in your normally mild-mannered co-workers.

But before we get covered in green paint we start with a scene as two identical muscular soldiers (Molnar and Omar) relax in their (quite swanky) living room. Nice place. Lots of plants. Will be useful when you’re shipped off to ‘Nam. These two guys’ bodies are huge; apparently this is what happens when you eat nothing but pork for twenty-five years. They invite Hector Jordan over and Molnar gets busy orally servicing the two studs’ thick uncut tools. Omar has a go servicing his buddies causing Molnar’s watermelon sized pecs to expand and contract with pleasure as his tight-foreskinned prick is made very wet. You know, phomosis is very common, nothing to be ashamed of and easily treatable, guys.

Omar then straddles blonde cutie Jordan (who never once takes his t-shirt off; embarrassing tattoo maybe?) whilst sucking on Molnar’s sausage. Omar is covered in their white goulash before impressively releasing his own spray over his tight shaved stomach.

Brief target practice scene next, guaranteed to send anyone chemically-induced spiraling into a really bad trip. The targets are two dummies with trashcan-liner heads pinned to a wall with a huge spiders web motif painted on it. Good old fashioned nightmare material! Two soldiers, Pal and Gregor, have invited Silvano to play for their team - an unintentional double entendre followed by the intentional “I’ll count on you to train him well and get him ready for action”, which even sounds filthy on paper. Made me think of the fun Ewan McGregor must have had training Hayden Christensen in the Star Wars movies.

After the target practice is over they reward his good work with their cocks. He’s stripped naked (God he’s gorgeous) and tongue-worshipped before he’s on his knees servicing the Privates’ privates in a shot reminiscent of Kristen Bjorn’s style. Pretty soon he’s bent over the table receiving Pal’s huge delivery before Gregor has a go. In an unfortunate term of events that may jeopardize a porno-career, Gregor’s dick color makes it look like Silvano hasn’t (ahem) douched between takes.

His hole well and truly banged out of shape by the soldiers, in loads of positions, he unleashes a spray of the white stuff that is so impressive it gets an encore showing whilst the two grunts grunt out their batter all over him, and then lick it off!

Next up there’s basement antics with raw recruits Hahn and Uriel. Our coverstars seduce each other and strip to reveal perfectly toned bodies that look amazing and natural compared to some of the other performers who could easily be mistaken for female Soviet shot-putters of the 1970s. Both give each other great head before they work their inches to impressive orgasms.

The wargames start in an abandoned factory filled with what look like giant mutant Cheerios. A couple of things here - check the rulebook guys: If you get hit you are out of the game - you don’t keep firing, Mr. Terminator. And one team doesn’t wear masks. Those balls can blind you if they hit you in the face!

Wargames over, skinhead Gulyas refuses to give up (there’s always one) and runs into the woods, with Gregor in hot pursuit. I really hoped he might come across some Japanese paintballers asking if the war is over yet, but alas, none were forthcoming. After a brief paintball skirmish Gregor is the winner and claims his reward by unbuckling and forcing Gulyas to choke on his Liberty Sausage. Muscular Gulyas, covered in green paint, takes it up against a convenient tree before the two smooth guys (again with Gregor’s unfortunate dick color) missionary to a great climax with Hungarian payloads deployed noisily.

Back in an indoor-pool Pal and Jordan (remember them?) force captives Hahn and Kinceses to strip before pushing them into the pool. Their splashing arouses our friends and are subsequently fed two rations of soldier meat in a great sequence that just keeps getting hotter. Following a daisy chain where Kincses eats out Hahn whilst being fucked by the still t-shirted Jordan the two slim smooth losers get an even better treat. They climb aboard a cock each and have their tight asses pumped, Hahn looking great as he rides on Jordan’s immense wang. This pulsating sequence ends with the captors shooting their own paintballs in the faces of their captives whilst each spews a thank-you globule of their own.

Great sex, wonderfully produced. More tight white flesh, foreskins, trimmed pubes and shaved balls then you can fire a gun at. Silvano is totally gorgeous and first time director Kodaly has definitely got a great career ahead of him. Watch this space.
-Froufrou A. Gogo