Review

Pacific Sun releases yet another brilliant title. I’m really waiting for the turkeys. Even Scorsese made Kundun for Christ’s sake! Familiar (a little too familiar, now) foreskins and faces abound here – particularly Giorgio, Goldsmith and Endino for starters.

The (ahem) story here is about international Mafiosi types relaxing in their hideaway hotel that’s so hideaway it’s practically signposted from the interstate. It’s no wonder that our International Feds are closing in. The subtitling as usual is awful. Here’s a brief note of the subtitling mistakes that happen within the first five minutes:

“You like drink? It fine.
I got the rum of Columbia.
This is most serious in the market.
It seems to be having a great profit of it.
I need friends who wnat to invest my business.
My company bought more hectar of grape in Spain.
Nobody have founded it yet.
Be clam!
We founded two guys down here.”

Thank fuck the cops burst in and the fucking begins…

Turns out everyone’s wandered off to separate rooms so in the best Aliens style our cops disband and go hunting. First up Goldsmith and Cuza’s chinwag is rudely interrupted by Bradshaw and Skerritt. Fantasy kicks in as the drapes are closed and our two criminals each get a cock to suck. Before long everyone’s being nailed as Skerritt fucks Goldsmith whilst Bradshaw hits on Cuza. Goldsmith eventually gets it from everyone, including his accomplice. This fabulous scene ends as all four pop their corks at once. These guys love their jobs.

In the best scene of the movie Bonetti is happily enjoying a Jacuzzi with Giorgio (and who wouldn’t) and things get a little steamy. Outside in the corridor cops Antonelli and mega-gorgeous Endino look on, forget all about their duty to protect and serve and start ripping each other’s clothes off. (Hello, crime lords here?) All four eventually get into the Jacuzzi, Endino now riding Giorgio before Antonelli has a quick go. Endino cums and goes, leaving Antonelli to have a lovely spitroast.

Manzel has been checking e-mails in a bedroom and undresses for bed as our boys in blue creep up the stairs. He’s nude as they force their way into the room and can’t control themselves. Our three baldy heroes: Jones, Mantegna and Yul Brynner-clone Laforet have a raunchy tongue session before Manzel orally services them all. He’s then fucked by all three.

Our three remaining officers, Cronenberg, Nielsen and Collins have had the sex vibes no doubt (I’m guessing this hotel is like a nymphomaniac version of the one in The Shining) so they too are naked in no time. Nielsen works Cronenberg’s nipples whilst Collins works his cock. Nielsen gets anally probed by his buddies and sadly the film ends with a coda of them all getting arrested and the credits roll.

Great movie, but shame it ends so abruptly. Another scene would not have gone amiss. Oh, and the cover isn’t free of spelling mistakes either. But no doubt you’ll find it delivers on its promise of being “orney”. It’s very orney. Believe me.
-Froufrou A. Gogo