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Review

Oh Sugar Boxx, how do we love thee? Let's count the ways: Boobs. Catfights. Whippings. More Boobs. Boobs Sweating in the Hot Box. Brutal Rape. Forced Coochie-Sucking. Prostitution. Murder. Pissed Off Chicks Wielding Swords. We could go on, but you get the point: Women in Prison is back and its name is Sugar Boxx.

OK, so maybe director Cody Jarrett had it easy. He clearly had the benefit of watching all of the awesome women-in-prison flicks of the '70s and '80s and was able to take pretty much everything that awesome about them and cram them into one fucking awesome neo-grindhouse experience. Yes, there's an undercover reporter lady. Yes, there's a pissed-off, jive-talking black cellmate who starts off an an enemy but ends up a bestie. Yes, there are multiple scenes where women's tops come off for no apparent reason.

The story is as old as, well, we don't know, but it's old. Hot lesbo lady reporter gets a tip that some chick she used to know is holed up in a Florida prison where something shady is going down. Before you can say Linda Blair, she's concocted a plan to get herself locked up there as a supposed junkie hooker. We've gotta say that the scene where the sheriff roughs her up, pulls down her top and pins her to the hood saying "Tits on the hood and spread 'em," is fucking tight. The look on her face when she realizes that she may have gotten herself into a bit more shit than she's prepared for is classic... and it gave us a chubby. Anyway, where were we?

Oh right... the story. Anyhoo, pretty soon she's dragged to the prison camp and, naturally, made to strip again while a lady guard hoses her down with delouser spray. After she's all cleaned up, she gets to meet the dykey warden who offers her the choice of hard labor or the easy life with once a week sex parties for the rich and powerful. At first, she chooses as the old knight in Last Crusade would say "unwisely" and ends up in a cell with a hot pissed-off black hooker and some sweet & innocent thing. Fast forward a few minutes and our blonde heroine's gotten her naked ass locked up in a hot box for fighting her roomie. But when they get out, they discover, whoops!, her sweet roomie's offed herself fdue to a nasty gang rape perpetrated by some dickhead guards. (Yes, we get to see it tits and all.)

At long last, blondie decides to do what she got her ass locked up in jail for, goes to beg the warden to let her in on the good life of pool parties and sexual slavery. Of course, the hot MILFy warden makes her work for it, forcing her to crawl across the floor with her tits out and get to sucking some warden coochie. Bing. Bam Boom. Sex parties are infiltrated, shit gets fucked up, the man is brought down, only to be exonerated and vigilante justice in the form of hot chicks wielding machetes becomes necessary. e could go on, but, frankly, there ain't much else and, let's face it, you're in. You need this movie. It's got tits, rape, whippings, catfights, a groovy '70s-styled score, forced cunnilingus, unforced cunnilingus... oh right we already told you about all of that. Well, we'll leave you with this thought, then... ah screw it, we're going to go jerk off to this movie again.

 -- Rick Stanko