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Skinopsis

Let's face it: James Bond movies would be much cooler (or at least more cock-straightening) if they had a hot chick as the secret agent dude and that hot chick spent most of her time walking around totally naked with her swinging masterpieces of surgical genius dangling from her chest like golden orbs of wanktasticness. That's why, despite its lower production values and often excruciatingly bad synthy sex music, we'll take Beverly Lynne over that craggly British fuck Daniel Craig any day of the week. In this slit-filled farce, she's like a spy or some shit who has to play cards with a villainess to stop, uh, something bad from happening. There are some raunchily fantastic simulated fuckmaking moments featuring the amazing silicone sacks of Nicole Sheridan, Charlie Laine, Monique Parent and more plus shower scenes, totally gratuitous nudity and cheesy laughs.

-- Rick Stanko