Review

Hey look, a plot! This oughta make Heather J. happy! Here’s the story:

Veronica Harte (oh, sorry, that’s “Hart”) plays Amanda in this classic. Although beautiful Amanda is trying to get out of the sex industry, she still manages to find it in her hart (sorry, I mean “heart”) to set up two girls, Bev and Gwen, on a B/D date with a big shot who can give her lover zoning permission for his new club. It all goes terribly wrong, however, when Mr. Big drowns poor dear Bev in his swimming pool. Never fear! Detective Ambrose Hart (oops, that’s “Harte”) is on the case, tracking down clues and interrogating Amanda and her boyfriend about their roles in the the whole harte-breaking (uh, “heart-breaking”) affair. Little does he know that the hartless (ok, ok, ok!) double-crossing boyfriend is up to no good. Can Harte save Hart without losing heart? Be still, my beating... oh, never mind. Let’s talk about the sex:

Scenes of Mistress Bev and Mistress Gwen in black vinyl working on Mr. Not-So-Big-After-All (“You lick just like old women fuck!”) are intercut with scenes of Amanda in sexy white lingerie gently and sweetly seducing a trick (“Would you like to kiss my breasts, Andy? I’d like that.”). Then, there’s the crooked cop Roserio initiating his buddy Fender at a massage parlor (“If you’re gonna be on the vice squad, you gotta know about vice...”) which involves a double blow-job. One of the best scenes is at a party, where the hostess proposes a contest: long-dick Freddy has two minutes to get it up and then two women have three minutes to make him come. Those three get it on in the middle of the living room while the guests stand around cheering and rubbing themselves. And the winner is..... well, you really gotta see it for yourself! At the same time, Amanda and another woman are doing some guy in an upstairs bedroom. Back at home, Amanda is comically interrupted by Harte while she’s in the middle of a loud solo scene. A very special mention goes to the underwater camera shot of Gwen in the bathtub (both hands, baby!) before she and Amanda’s lover have a druggy fuck in slow-mo (don’t try this at home!).

It’s got the look, sound, and feel of some 70’s cop drama re-run on TV on a Sunday afternoon. If it weren’t for the sex, you’d think you were watching Streets of San Francisco. The story moves along at a good pace, with sex scenes thrown in more for decoration than plot propulsion, but they’re not out of context. There’s even a stab at character development as Amanda explains how she got into the business in the first place. Bev and Roserio do a great job as supporting actors and there are some genuinely funny scenes and sarcastic one-liners that’ll make you laugh out loud. Not surprisingly, this movie won several AVN awards. As vintage plot porn goes, it’s got to be one of the best.
- Libby Dinas

 -- Libby Dinas